Recently, authorities urgently arrested suspect V.N.Q.Tr. (26 years old, from Gia Lai) for beating and torturing an 8-year-old girl in Ho Chi Minh City, causing the victim’s death.
The suspect is the child’s father’s fiancée. It is known that all three are living in the same apartment in Binh Thanh district.
Initial information8-year-old girl was taken to the emergency room in a state of coma, cardiac arrest, and apnea and died before being taken to the hospital. There are many large bruises on her body, with old, blurred wounds on her face.
The incident is still in the investigation stage, but the fact that an 8-year-old child lived with his father and stepmother and was abused to death is enough to make anyone angry. Before leaving his life in pain, that child, separated from his mother, must have experienced so much sadness, hurt, and ultimate loneliness.
“A few generations of cakes have bones/A few generations of stepmothers love their husband’s children” the father’s conclusion is not without basis. Not only is it rare for stepparents to love their stepchildren, but what is more important is the behavior and choices of the biological parents.
Divorcing his wife when the child was only 4 years old, Mr. Le Minh Tuan (39 years old in Ho Chi Minh City) was given custody of the child. He said he did not fight over the child with his ex-wife because he realized that in any situation, a child should have priority to stay with the mother.
However, there are things that only insiders can understand. His ex-wife was in poor health, had an unstable job, and had some personal reasons that he did not want to discuss, so it was reasonable for the child to stay with him at that time.
When I was a child, many people met a boy who used to make cruel jokes and say that one day his father would get married and have a younger sibling, then leave him alone, making him cry and be afraid. At that time, he made a promise to his son: “Before you became a healthy and independent young man, I had never married anyone. Only when you allow me will I get married!”.
I don’t want my first child to have to live in the situation of a stepmother and a stepchild, and then maybe a situation where his child – my child – our child is in the same house when he is too young. Although he understands many good stepmothers, according to him, it will be difficult for the child to avoid moments of sadness…
By now, the son is 13 years old and taller than the father. I’m ready for my dad to start a new family because I’m afraid he’ll grow old and be alone. He is also ready, now just waiting for the right person to accompany him.
According to Mr. Tuan, in the case of a stepmother or stepfather abusing a child, the first and biggest fault lies with the biological parents. They have not put their children as a top priority but instead put their children in a “weak” position in the family in their parents’ new relationship.
“I don’t say If you’ve already had a child once, don’t do it again. But as parents, we have responsibility for our children. Need to ask yourself if you have enough capacity to protect your child to help him or her be happy in the new family? If you can’t do that, it’s best to stay alone to raise the child,” Mr. Tuan said.
According to him, the stepmother or stepfather will look at the child’s biological parents and act. A child If your parents love you, take care of you, and try to protect them even when they are divorced, you will not be bullied easily.
“If you love me, try to wait… my child will grow up”
After broken marriages, mothers will often continue to raise children. On this journey, many women choose to put aside their personal feelings and live alone to raise their children…
16 years of raising two children alone after divorcing her husband, Ms. Nguyen Thi Ha, 48 years old, worked at a hospital in Ho Chi Minh City. In the past and now, there are still men pursuing her.
Receiving many love confessions and promises, she said: “If you truly love me, please wait for me… after 50 years old. At that time, my two children were both working or married, so we had no more problems.”
Both of my children were girls, Ms. The family will be extremely complicated. The heartbreaking events of the stepfather and stepchild scene haunted Ms. Ha and she determined that she did not want her and her children’s lives to fall into tragedy with no way out.
Raising a child alone, being both a father and a mother, Ms. Ha expressed that being a single mother is extremely difficult and stressful. Difficulties range from having to put food on the table, sometimes when parents and children share a loaf of bread, time pressure to psychological challenges. Be strong enough to raise your children. But as time passes, the children grow up more and more safely in their mother’s arms…
From her own experience, Ms. Ha expressed her wish for parents to be careful. Think carefully before deciding to divorce as well as moving forward.
If you are forced to decide to separate, both parties should put the children’s interests first, do not fight for custody of the children just because of pride. The parent does not have enough capacity and responsibility.
First of all, parents need to create conditions for each other to raise and visit the child so that the other person can have regular contact with the child… If conditions are not created, then the parent /Mothers also have to do everything they can to find places to visit their children and understand their situation. That is the child’s right and also a way to protect the child whether the parent has moved on or not.
In fact, many cases of children being abused by their stepfathers and stepmothers occurred in situations where they were not allowed to interact with their biological mother and biological father for a long time. They only know that their child has been abused when the incident has already happened…
Like the case of the 8-year-old girl who died from suspected abuse mentioned above, she hasn’t been able to see her mother for nearly a year.
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