On December 14, after 1.5 months in the hospital for burn treatment, Ms. V.T.D., the mother in the incident of 3 daughters pouring gasoline on their mother who died. Previous Mrs. D.’s two daughters “went ahead” in the family tragedy.
No one can Can you imagine the incident where the three daughters brought a can of gasoline to water and set fire to their mother’s house and burned her down because of a conflict over land inheritance? Behind the inhumane behavior of the three daughters, the cause began with division Land inheritance division between sons and daughters is also an issue that needs to be analyzed.
Repressed trauma
Ms. Le Thuy Anh, 43 years old, lives in Hanoi shared that she was shaken by the news of the incident of three daughters in Hung Yen burning their mother over land division when she saw her family’s picture in it, and sent the link (link to the article). Message your mother to read and hope she thinks more about the signs of favoring men and women in everyday behavior.
Ms. Anh said that her family has 4 sisters and a younger brother They love each other very much, but it is the mother’s discrimination between men and women that has pushed the daughters into the depths of self-pity and inhibition.
Up to now, everything in the family has been like repairing the house, buying utensils, and building a tomb. ma… the mother takes all of her daughter’s money and doesn’t touch a penny from her son even though the youngest son is taken care of, studies, invests in work… now has the highest income among the sisters.
The sisters who had to make ends meet when buying a house in installments often pooled money to lend to each other to limit bank loans, but every time their mother intervened and forbade the daughters to borrow money from their younger brothers sold a piece of land to put money together for her son but also “forced” her daughters to lend to her younger brother.
Mrs. Anh remembers that period with the sadness she felt at that time was having a hard time, so she only lent her 100 million VND, which was half the “target” of 200 million VND that her mother gave her. In response, she scolded her daughter with harsh words: “If I knew that, I wouldn’t give birth to this kind of child.” /p>
And yet, Ms. Anh said that many years later, her younger brother continuously avoided paying his sisters’ debt. And very logically, her mother was extremely upset when her daughter wanted to get back the money she lent. She said: “You guys It’s right to give me that much!” and also threatened, “If anyone wants to take money from me, just come and ask for it… mother”.
The mother’s emphasis on men and women created a toxic atmosphere in Ms. Anh’s family. From her words to her behavior, she seems to only have sons and grandsons. Daughter celebrates Tet with mother 10 million, she pouts and criticizes little. But when her son gave her 5 million, she would only accept 2 million and give her 3 million.
Mrs. Anh’s younger sister gave birth to two daughters, but was constantly criticized by her own mother, “you don’t know how to give birth” and urged to give birth to the older boy.
The land of our grandparents in the countryside is vast and undivided, but all sisters know that with the mindset of a mother, a daughter should not think of having a share. She always said everything belonged to the youngest son.
Mrs. Anh asserted that she and her sisters did not desire the land and houses their parents left behind because their lives were all peaceful, but they felt uneasy and resentful. arguing with the mother because of the biased and unfair treatment between the children, the land issue also becomes more pressing. Accordingly, the distance between mother and daughters is getting farther and farther apart.
“No one can accept or forgive the act of a daughter burning her mother. But through this incident, parents also need to look at and review their behavior with their children to avoid tragedy. family drama “a woman with childhood trauma cannot help but choke up.
Don’t turn your back and click your tongue on the matter of favoring men over women
Ms. Tran Thu Ha, author of a series of famous books on child education, expressed that she felt scared and haunted by the story of three daughters who together poured gasoline on the house, burned their mother, and burned themselves. That is not only a violation of the law but also a violation of human morality.
According to information, the incident originated from a dispute between three daughters over the land their parents left behind with their son. The three daughters asked for another piece of land on the street, but the mother did not agree. The two sides quarreled many times until it led to tragedy.
This incident There are many perspectives and many issues, but author Tran Thu Ha expressed that she sees in it a story about the ideology of favoring men over women, biased parents not giving fair love to their children…
The most heartbreaking thing in this story, according to Ms. Ha, is that even though many mothers are women, they look down on women and are often the ones who take care of their parents when they are sick They only rely on their daughters to take care of them. But many daughters, from childhood to adulthood, only receive love and care that is biased compared to their brothers in the family.
Mrs. Ha said she used to receive Witnessed the family’s sisters having to eat poorly while the son was given a separate pot of white rice and meat. In some families, the son was like the king of the house, and the sisters had to take care of the servants, fetch water for him to wash his feet, and go to work to earn money. from a very early age to take care of the “dead child” to eat, study, have fun and spend money carefree.
“At the admission office of an international school today, I see many families come to listen to advice on tuition calculations and then decide. She plans to only send her son to an international school, but it’s okay for her daughter to “invest a little” and go to a village school, Ms. Ha said.
The author of the book “Think, I don’t know” emphasizes the bias of Parents cause harm to children’s psychological health and growth. Many people, after growing up, choose to run away, but the pain of rejection still haunts them.
A girl once wrote to her: “Miss, the questions that haunt me the most are “why does mom/dad love you more than me? I was gently explained, but I was scolded?”. The invisible distance between the two sisters has been created deep in our memories and into the unconscious. Now there are times when I also unintentionally behave badly towards my sister. boys then torment…”.
Furthermore, unfair treatment is not good for even favored boys. Being too favored when they are children, when they grow up, they are easily selfish and have no will. It is difficult to become a nice person, it is difficult to be kind, it is difficult to be kind. And they are often hated and shunned by their own sisters.
“Certainly no one wants their children to go to court and sue each other in the future. Most of our people have limited knowledge of the law. and the mentality of being afraid to hire a lawyer to sue your brothers in court. But to be honest, that’s more civilized than burning down your mother’s house.” Mrs. Ha felt bitter.
Through the cruel case, Mrs. Ha expressed her mother. In the story of growing up in a village environment, that is already the case, but for most people today, the internet is in their pockets. Information is everywhere, almost free, from raising children, treating children fairly when they are young, to legal knowledge. about inheritance, talks about living and letting go… So each person cannot refuse to say they do not understand.
“Don’t turn your back and click your tongue to ignore the issue of favoring men over women!” Ms. Ha called out. .
“
